Self-Study

Hello! It has been way too long since I have posted here. Unfortunately, I have written this statement more often than I would like. However, these last four years have been so different for me because I have been trying to prioritize myself and my professional goals. I had to remember that I initially created this blog to document my journey within librarianship, so I want to do a better job of that. 

I’m shifting gears for my latest professional development blog post. Although I haven’t attended any conferences recently, I’ve found a new way to focus on my growth. Now that I’m taking a break from school, I finally have the time to dive into reading and reflecting on topics that truly interest me. This pause has given me space to explore areas that matter to me personally and align with my professional work in health equity.

Here are some of the topics I’m excited to explore more deeply:

• Trauma: I’m currently co-writing a book about trauma, and along the way, I’ve accumulated a collection of books on the topic. The ones I’ve read so far have been truly life-changing. They’ve shifted the way I think and how I talk about trauma to the point that I find myself referencing them almost every week. These works have become a part of my everyday conversations and reflections. As I continue this journey, I’m eager to dive even deeper by finishing the books I’ve purchased, particularly those written by Black, Indigenous, and People of Color (BIPOC) authors. These voices offer powerful perspectives that will only enrich my understanding of trauma as I continue working on this project.
• Grief: I’ve been thinking lately about how I want to dive deeper into the topic of grief because, in the US, we do a terrible job of allowing folks to grieve. As the saying goes, the one guarantee in life is that we will die. So why don’t we do a better job of supporting people when loss happens? I know that it has to do with capitalism and white supremacy. However, I want to know how grief shows up in the lives of Black women like me. Grief is something I feel I’ve only scratched the surface of, yet it’s been a constant in different ways. I want to read more about how we, as Black women, carry grief and how we’re finding new ways to heal from the losses we don’t always have the space to acknowledge fully. It’s time I make more room for that, to understand it beyond just surviving.
• Racism and whiteness in America: And then there’s racism and whiteness in America, which always seems to find its way into my day-to-day reality. I know we talk about it often, but I’m craving more in-depth reading, especially from voices that really get the intersection of race, gender, and identity. I want to explore how other BIPOC are naming and confronting the ever-present pressures of whiteness and how they’re pushing back in ways that center our well-being. There’s something powerful about immersing myself in stories and truths that reflect my current realities. There’s so much more to learn and unlearn, especially about the history of policing, the carceral system, housing, education, and the dark history of medicine. Just to name a few areas where racism rears its ugly head. 
• Body Politics: Body politics is something I’ve been wanting to explore more deeply, especially through books that tackle anti-fatness and physical ability discrimination. It’s no secret that society constantly policies bodies, especially Black bodies. For far too long, fatness has been demonized, and people with disabilities have been dismissed or treated as afterthoughts. I’m drawn to how we can challenge these narratives and create spaces that embrace everybody for exactly what it is. I want to read more stories that expose how harmful these systems of discrimination are, how they strip people of their humanity, and, just as importantly, how people are resisting them. Books that confront anti-fatness and ableism speak to a bigger truth: our bodies, in all their forms, are worthy of love, respect, and care. There’s something liberating about diving into these topics, knowing that by doing so, I’m not only unlearning but also contributing to a future where we all feel free in our skin.

I look forward to reading ALL the books I have purchased over the years. My book collection is impressive, so I don’t need to buy any more books until I get through them. I keep going back and forth on whether I should set a goal, and I think I should do so. I think a book a week is reasonable. 

I’d love to hear your thoughts as I dive deeper into these topics. Here are a few questions to get the conversation going:

1. What books or resources have changed your understanding of grief, trauma, racism, or body politics?

2. How do you create space for yourself to reflect and grow professionally outside of formal training or conferences?

3. Are there any BIPOC authors or voices you’ve found particularly powerful when exploring topics like trauma or body politics?

Feel free to share your recommendations or thoughts in the comments!